simple truths

Wake UP World. Stop your dreamy slumber, where nightmares unfold and keep you under. Wake up, those demons have led you asunder. Your love and his mercy, in night, h as shined through, and here I AM, having Deja Vu Our waking dreams we're told to suppress Lest you find your self like the rest, of these day dreamy fools, these Naives, these ignorants, who see beyond hill tops, graves and cement. They see the dawn and its glorious Rise. Thy will be done, let your people survive the heart-shaking tremors of a human kind, reverberating through all, like a bell that has chimed, but forever ago, this bell was struck to a tune we all know, but have learned to mistrust. so Wake UP people. Now it is time, To take back our world, and claim Us as your kind, To plant and to reap, to eat and to sleep, with patience and waiting, yet called to our feet. Wake UP Humankind, These chills down my spine, did not come from fear, but from this place we did find, within our hearts, without our mind.

My bare feet situated in the dirt, pebbles and pine needles strobing heat in red and orange waves, hugs my skin The wind playing in my hair like a cat with soft new yarn The timelessness of this scene stretching beyond history's time. Peacefully content and warm, those I love, sleep near nothing lacking, nothing needed, we have been provided for And as I voice my praise, in gratitude of God's mercy My sights are directed to the towering Kings of this forest. Silence. Utter silence as if the world were put on mute, my gaze transfixed on these massive statues, and I see. The wind, I know to be as one animal, melting into their stone they danced in silent magnitude against the glowing night sky. My mouth opened to no words which could justify I could only smile deeply and feel the sudden hot rain I laughed and my heart danced with those Kings, in the oneness of the wind, which has became my breathe. Rochelle 2013

I can pass it over, step away or set it down... ..."and anytime I please." But what truth do I breath? How do I prove, and better, to whom... I am not a prisoner in this self inflicited womb. What happens to my reserve, my nerve to kick the devil behind? I can... anytime I please... ...sit face-to face in fear of what I shall do when he leaves. My cerebral sidekick, who keeps me whole, will never call out or reach even one decipal. Though short and sorry when it comes to brass, he is as light on the righteuos path. His kinisthetic brother. Feeds and Devours. Just as water can save or destroy a flower; Filling my mind with no charm and less wit. Only raw sensation, leaving bitter grit. Into my surreptitious silence they invade. Was my mind ever mine to be made? While one fuels the fire, which I use to keep safe, in confidence the other patiently waits. Were they always there, the creators of my Individ-duality? Or am I the one who gave birth to this personality?

Writing doesn't change a thing It lets me scream It lets me sing but really, it doesn't change a thing Lists unchecked and charts unfilled piles of journals filled with words that can't be killed My tongue is dry and my hand is cramped I'm tired but listless and still I can't I still can't write to make a difference I still can't write to meet indifference I still can't write to make others see Because all these words were only for me My own satisfaction My own voice to sing All my living breathing words will never change a thing.

Seal the deal Close the sale Yes or No tonight sir maybes always fail Asking the questions assuming the sale Hearing the answers but maybes always fail Unlike horseshoes and handgrenades where almost sometimes count Failure is surely where maybe will surrmount So before I pack the bag and let this go Sir, I'll have to ask you for a Yes or No Yes, a no will cost you Maybe a maybe if free But without a yes from you tonight I may just have to let you be

Paved roads and planted trees Carved stones and boxed flowers Pathetic miniatures of our sun, once a god, now a cold steel mockery, line the way to our destiniation Our massive crawling sprawling race bustling together to be on time On time, in place, ready to go As if we knew of tomorrow As if the morning star would lead the way We build our plastic castles and breed our fiberglass mares We trample the unconcious earth deaf to our mother's screams the hum of our new sun has drown her out However, inside the painted portrait of we, the civilized gods in suit lies a sleepy, if not dormant beast Dreaming to ride the rythms of the tides and to sleep by the watch of god.

What does love mean to you, please explain Love is a steady rock. A promise made not with words, but through loving actions. To be that person's lightpost when lost Love is unwavering, undeniable,  and understanding It will fight for itself Even to the surprise of those  who think they can arrogantly defeat it Love is wanting for the other and their needs as much as you want for your own It is knowing the person is worth more than the point To give way for the sake of the other is love not cowardess Love is accepting you are not each other and never asking the other to become, only to be Love is always abundant, always accessible and always receptive to itself.

Damaged goods is what they call us The poor little dears of the world Twisted and molded and pounded like dough to rise and become an image  of what could have been Grasping desperately  for that small thread of security In self and in others That small thread  that will remain so elusive Always slightly discontented Not knowing for sure what others want or need  or where you'll go Maybe it's better to let go than to arrive To be and not to become Is that the question? The answer is in the final product It's not what we became, it's who we are.

Scream into a pillow it's no ones fault but your own Let the sream fade with no satisfaction, no action no more passion Just defeat But wait! A glimpse of the sun and there she runs Feet to the street But the map is at home. Home? Isn't that where you were going?

I was told to come home but instead found myself as the hotel A very nice one, but one that apparently  expects too much from it's customers Don't get me wrong, rates are cheap service is great, and there's always a vacancy But they have this funny thing about not keeping reservations you set They still let you keep reserving the room But then charge you with wasting their time Not sure why the manager just can't get over it and get off my ass.

How could you!? How f-cking dare you! Trample on me, knowing what I've been through To let me trust you, to love you F-ck you, you don't deserve my love and never again will you have my trust To behold me, quivering against the breathe of this world You touched me, your eyes pierced through me and I felt your light and love heal me, Then POP! a f-cking slap in the face. HaHa, you were kidding or lying, or changed your mind Whatever the f-ck your problem is It's not mine anymore You want space, yet you begged me to come back WHY!?  So you could have some little bitch on the side to play with like a dollar store toy. Fun, cheap, easy to get But who cares if it gets broken Sure as f-ck not you! I was willing to listen and care and give you what you needed with no complaints But you had to toss me aside with no regard and now I sit here, alone and broken Broken again. F-ck you! How dare you!? and good riddance.

How can such deep connections be broken so sharply Where once stood strong roots, now a blowing twig in the breeze Do the roots still lie under the surface Like a mother's roots remain within her infant's belly Long after their ties were cut Are these roots of use, can we still grow from them Or do they just leave a permanent mark of our humanity One that proves our dependence and survival all in one To live for relationships knowing to trust means to fall To live for connections knowing they are never tangible Means to be as the twig, plant your roots but be ready to fly What the twig holds that roots do not, is the bud Roots may only become deeper where they stand Only through painful transplantation can they try to start again But the bud, upon a floating twig can start anew Wherever the wind may place it.

Fear, anger- that familiar knot in my gut The knot I'm hopeless to undo That burns and rubs against it's own fibers but never the satisfaction of a flame Words that don't exist choke up inside my throat My tongue begging for reprieve from my silent angst My body tugs at itself looking for escape My hands reach for something to fix, But what's been broken is intangible and unfixable To scream, to sing To build and move To be freed from my prison Ah, what sweet relief that would be Instead I fear I will sit here in my cell and continue to eat my poison because it's all there is to take One day however, after enough dreams toward peace I will breathe, and feel that knot release That breath will feel like the first To appreciate something so life giving That never existed in my world before.

This is me, now who will I be I've struggled and fought, yet life was still handed to me I was dealt a crooked hand and have been what I am but now who will I be I have a right to passage That was handed to me but nothing else will be I take a stance wherever I stand Decisions or no, Fight or flow I still am who I am, and who I will be This is me and I know, like I know, like I know That I will decide who to be.

The rain is black and soggy and my heart is drenched and dripping Flooding the lives of those I love I didn't mean to be this way I thought I was more More than a dark puddle of conciousness Weary and flat from my own attacks I thought I had more to offer but the rain had washed it away I held in my hands, the red, white and blue ideals but let them float away So I could reach my greatness my destiny, myself I didn't know myself, and what I see now is pain Unreached potential, unfulfilled dreams an unraised child looking for a home But I have no home, so I must build One stick, one brick, one stone at a time. And hope, that as I build, by the grace of god my home will not be washed away by the rain.

I spent years building my home, piece by piece. I was just beginning to decorate it when a large well came up and washed it away. So completely even the foundation was invisible. I wandered and waded in the swamp that remained where my solid home had stood. I even dove under the dark cold waters to find the pieces and rebuild...but they were gone, washed away. I then began to scramble for a new home. Paddling against the currents looking for any space to hold onto and rebuild. I heard the voices around me telling me which way to swim and I was trying to listen but could not reach their voices, the currents were too strong. For a moment I thought I would drown. As with any near death experience, my life flashed before my eyes. I saw all I had done for it's reality, instead of how I wanted to see it. I cried. I cried for my losses, I cried for my wrongdoings, I cried for myself and my tears filled this swamp I had created until it became a river. Then... ...I finally gave up. I lay o