simple truths

It is not easy to say goodbye. There is so much I want to hold onto. Friendships, termed loosely for the warm feeling I hope to receive, but truly decorative shells for a convenient acquaintance. Relationships, with so much potential for fireworks and lasting love, but in the simplest terms, a dud. Family, a safety net- a lighthouse to be counted on, but really a group of lost souls trying to claim boundary. Yes, I looked down this road to where it bent into the undergrowth- and I took it. But perhaps he was right, old Frost,  I may have taken the other one, just as fair. I believe I will. We all cry out for safety, warmth and familiarity- making decisions with the least possibility for damage to our fragile egos. What if?, this... What if?, that... Well? What IF? Do you know? Would it kill you to find out? Or would it kill everyone else to see you try? Decisions must be made on individual terms, not dismissing the effect it will have on others… Ultimately, one must decide for himsel

A sneaking cold tingle, tapping into my skin like needles That shiver of denial, and that ache of knowing A bitter gag of familiar pain contorts my gut Quiet reflection and voluminous reprisal An inner swell that forces the truth and washes the lies The scene lies bare and open for change A simple, clear certainty descends No more answers needed No more questions worth my breath and curiosity Coals of rage, betrayal, disgust and self loathing Let out a steep sigh of release Feeling the cool weight of valediction long overdue I am myself, all that remains All there ever was All I need to be.

Horrific things happen in the smoothest of ways- creeping in unannounced and spreading before it can be caught, like the blood seeping from an open wound, it pours it's dark and permanent stain beyond the grasp of our control- There is no break from reality to experience these things--they are part of our normal life as much as the water we drink; ....no alarms will sound, no rush of empathy and support will crowd to ease the blow, you just take it! Only in the aftermath do we feel the hot tears well up, feel the guilt, loss, pain and shock...too late for apologies and too soon for forgiveness

How do I just move about my daily business? How can so many stick their head in the sand and just Take It!? We have become so focused on our personal woes and tribulations, our daily survival and life long pursuits, we can't bear to take on anyone else's burden or cause, nonetheless step back and think about our global community. Everyone is dying to make some kind of change in this insanity!!!  At this time in our human history we have grown past needing direct supervision and guidance. We do not need a father or chief to control and contain us. Our minds have been freed, even as we sit imprisoned by mindless drone work. We, no longer, must fear mother nature as a calculating threat to our kind. Lighting does not strike out of anger and droughts are not punishment for our deeds. We do not need these explanations any longer. With a better understanding of the earth, and a more humble view of our part in it, we can live amongst each other, as free people. We are all capable

Recently my living has been interrupted with the BiG questions. Why are we here? We live, we toil, we die..and why!? To teach our children to do the same? We all struggle with achieving our goals, striving to get somewhere, anywhere, in life.  We can never be satisfied with our lot on earth, as mammals, instinctual animals, because we just have to know WHY. We need reason. What other creature on earth asks Why? No lion wonders why she eats a gazelle. Sharks don't contemplate what kind of future their grandchildren will have or whether they're living up to their potential. We can send the brilliant dolphin down to retrieve a buried treasure and he simply uses his God given gifts and does what he is made to do, there is no questioning of purpose. What are we made to do? Even the brightest of the animals, those we sometimes compare ourselves to, live their lives for the shear value in that alone. Nothing bigger. There is nothing more complex to our existence. The act of experi